Yesterday I burst through my front door, put away all the random things I carry during the day, washed up and served myself a little plate of pasta.
I grabbed my plate and walked over to my computer to check some emails, check a few websites I frequent, the usual.
I just finished slurping up the last of my pasta when the phone rang.
It turned out to be my wife, who I chatted with for a few minutes when I noticed that one of my sisters was calling on the other line.
I couldn’t click over because my wife was still talking and as she continued to talk my other sister also called only seconds later.
My wife soon hung up and so I was able to pick up the other line and almost immediately I knew something was up. In fact, when I got those back to back calls from both my sisters I thought, “Oh no.”
My sister spoke in a low, weak voice and she said, “grandpa died today.” I was shocked. I mumbled a few things and hung up. I thought, “damn it, not again.”
I lost my paternal grandfather in 1994, my father in 2002, and my maternal grandfather yesterday.
I am, at this moment, filled with grief. And I’m not writing this to receive any sympathy or anything for that matter. I just want to say this:
Life is short. There isn’t any time to waste. Anxiety is stopping you from seeing and experiencing the full beauty of life and yourself.
You won’t fulfill whatever thing or things you hope for, and enjoy them, until you deal with this problem squarely.
No one, young or old, is promised another day, but I think that most of us act as if life will continue without a hitch because we don’t want to imagine the end.
We also get consumed by work, school, petty problems, hatreds, self-pity and all the rest of it. But I urge you to not fall victim to this kind of complacency.
Thing is, we all know we die, but few of us act like we know that.
It could be that you’ve tried to correct your anxiety problem and failed, and I’ll be honest, it took me nearly 10 years, a decade, to get this right, but it’s one of the best things you’ll ever do.
I’m not saying that it will take you as long as I took to get better, but you bet that this isn’t getting solved over night. That’s why it’s important to not wait anymore. Don’t wait for a better time, a different season, a new situation. The time is now.
Today is the day that you should decide to get better, so you can enjoy your life. Enjoy your family. Be who you want to be.
The good news is that you have what it takes to get the job done. We all do.
Don’t wait anymore.