By: Ashley J

Ashley J — Mon, 26 Dec 2011 16:55:23 +0000

I am trying to remember my first attack right now and the earliest one that sticks out to me is an incident in the supermarket back when I was around 19 or 20(2005). I had just gotten my tooth pulled and I was in the supermarket getting some soups and easy foods to swallow. I’ll never forget I was all the way in the last aisle and then all of a sudden I started to feel really sick. Everything was LOUD and QUIET at the same time, I could hear my heart beating, the aisle seemed longer, and there was no escape from pathmark. I started to get the worse stomach pains, and I have a phobia of vomiting so my nausea triggered my phobia, which triggered my anxiety, which triggered my nausea. Don’t ya love the cycle? My heart was beating so damn loud and my hands were shaking. The rest is slightly vague but I remember crying, a lot, and SOMEHOW someone found my family that was waiting for me in the car. My gramps came in to get me and took me to the car where he drove me home. We chalked it up to the meds and stress of the tooth pulling. But that wasn’t the last time. Another incident shortly afterwards while I was driving, I had to pull into a bus stop because I could no longer drive, walked to the hood of the car and was ready to puke my guts out. Nothing. Just short gasps of breath, nausea, and the heavy chest feeling. No food, no dry heave, nada. Just me sitting on the hood of a car, in a bus stop, on a crowded street, in the middle of the summer, blending right in. The anxiety has never GONE away but has subsided for weeks to months at a time. But they’re never REALLY gone. Now its Dec 2011, just turned 25, and have been hit with a MYRIAD of stressors and my anxiety has shot through the ROOF so badly that I can only sleep for MAYBE 2 hours at time. I wake up MID panic attack. The attack JOLTS me out of my sleep. So last night while I was laying on the floor (since no where and nothing else felt comfortable) and somehow came across this site on my smart phone. And BOY am I glad I did. I have been reading everything I can on this site and listening to all the podcasts for the last 8hrs (gotta do something with this insomnia) and I have so far been able to slowly coax myself down from full blown sleep attacks. Those are the ones I need to get past first because I NEED SOME SLEEP. I will be downloading ALL the podcasts, the e book, and buying the book. This is the first time I have felt some relief in WEEKS. When my gf saw me this morning (after I emerged from my hiding spot) she said I LOOKED better and SOUNDED better. I still havent slept. I am still scared as HELL of a lot of things, and have my phobias. BUT I have taken the firs step in the direction of gaining control back of my life. So THANK YOU so much for this site.

By: fantha

fantha — Sat, 27 Aug 2011 01:17:27 +0000

This is really a wonderful site.. like you i suffer anxiety and panic disorder 10 years ago until today! This happen when strange thought and rapid heartbeat arrive suddenly. I went to the restrooom to take a bath feeling that this sensation will lessen, until i decided to go to the emergency room. Until then, on and off panic conquered my life, no night life, no fun, just want being home to have rest rest rest! Worse thing is, last year rapid heartbeat put my mind that im going to be crazy, the fear of going crazy added my anciety.. when i am anxious i thought im going to die because of palpitations, when theres no palpitation i am thinking that i might go crazy.. fear of going crazy and going to die is the most worst happen to my life… my doctor a cardiologist gave me meds for hypertension lately this year because my bp went up from 120/90 to 160/100 every time i panic.. but i admited that i am on the pre hypertension range to mild hypertension because my usual bp is 129/90 and 130/80… back to anxiety, there was a time that in 1 month i went to emergency room 6 times and some resident doctors told me that i am only over reacting.. this anxiety ruin my life indeed.. but i am still hoping with GODs help i will feel better…. thanks

By: fantha

fantha — Sat, 27 Aug 2011 01:07:50 +0000

Comments on: My First Panic Attack

By: Ashley J

By: fantha

By: fantha