People in distress want instant relief. This makes sense.
After all, who likes to suffer?
However, focusing on instant relief, or outcomes, can be a problem. It can be problematic for the anxious person on many different levels.
When you’re seeking relief from anxiety you almost always think less about how you’re going to achieve freedom from anxiety and more about what it would be like to not have anxiety.
This mindset can blind you to the most important part of solving the anxiety puzzle, namely, finding a process that works and sticking to it until it brings relief.
Basically, you lose touch with a very important insight: The process is what brings relief not the result.
It’s easy to think nice thoughts about feeling better. But being invested only in those types of thoughts takes you away from the task at hand.
That’s like wishing and dreaming about being filthy rich and taking no action toward that end. So in that regard, you can think about mansions and fancy cars all you like, but if you don’t invest in the process of becoming rich what are those dreams worth?
Being invested in the process of healing isn’t as appealing as thinking about the final result. Yet if you were focused on the process of healing chances are you’d make a lot more progress than you’re making right now.
I found an interesting lecture on this idea. Take a few minutes to watch the video then reflect on it for a little.
I hope it adds a little perspective to your attempts to cope with stress and anxiety.
Paul,
Just wanted to say how much I love your site.
Lots of great, informative,and helpful info.
Thanks
Greg
Thanks for posting this Paul, it gives me something to think about!
@ Greg – Thanks Greg for taking the time to say thank you. When I get feeback from people it let’s me know that I’m doing something worth while.
@ Sue – You bet Sue. It is a simple but powerful idea.
Thank you. Good site and good links. I am in a panic attack, anxious cycle. Job stuff, kids in college. I have been prone to anxiety ad panic all my life but NOT all the time. In fact many people who know me would probably be surprised.
You write, “Yet if you were focused on the process of healing chances are you’d make a lot more progress than you’re making right now.” I know this to be true but the panic attacks wipes clean the sensible art of the brain that knows such processes to be true.
I gotta hit the healing path again, a process.
Thanks, Regine
Learnt so much from this snippet. Appreciate you posting it. Keep them coming, you truely are a great person.