Remember way back when you were a kid and life was simple, or at least simple–er? The good ole days, right? Well, unlike your days as a young’un, today your faced with lots of distractions. Nothing is simple anymore.
In fact, I’d say that much of your life’s simplicity has been taken away by all the distractions that anxiety throws at you.
Distraction has steered you away from seeing the big picture, which has probably also caused your anxiety to grow stronger than it needs to be.
So today I want to talk to you about four things that you can address that will help you to reduce distractions
These four things, like most great ideas, are staring you right in the face. So it’s not like you’re going to have to dig inside your soul or anything to address these issues.
However, you will have to get away from the pattern you’re currently in. The pattern I’m referring to is the one where you focus solely on your anxiety to the exclusion of other important factors. The pattern that makes everything about anxiety symptoms, intrusive thoughts and little else.
To help me explain these four critical things in an easy to understand way, I’m going to use the four modes of what’s called Roy’s Adaptive Model. Roy’s Adaptive Model is a nursing theory.
What does nursing have to do with combating abnormal anxiety you say? A lot actually. See, sometimes you gotta look for new ideas in what seem to be unusual places. Nothing wrong with unusual.
Anyway, nursing is about caring for people, in a nutshell, and Roy’s Adaptive Model, or the RAM, is about how to care for the whole of a person. You see, you have to get back to caring for the whole of yourself, and not just the anxious parts of you.
Now it’s time to smack your anxiety in the face! So here are the four things:
1. Physiological Mode: The Body
What this boils down to is making sure you’re healthy. This is so that you’re certain that it’s not a medical issue causing your anxiety AND to give yourself a reason to lose your fear of anxiety symptoms.
The idea is that if you know you’re healthy, then you’re less likely to assume that anxiety symptoms will be the death of you. Truthfully, getting to the point of not fearing anxiety symptoms is tricky, but you need to start somewhere.
So see your doctor, go through the wheel, and after that live with the results. Accept that you’re healthy!
2. Self-Concept Mode: Internal You
Do you have a good opinion of yourself?
We all need to know that we have value, that we matter. This is important to you psychologically and spiritually. I’m not trying to get all new age on you, just saying that you should be able to look into a mirror and be OK with what you see.
I’ve talked about this on the Anxiety Guru Show before, but I just know that some of you out there have allowed anxiety to steal your mojo. Believe in yourself. Value yourself. This matters.
3. Role Function: External You
We all play roles in life, actually we all have lots of different roles. Mom, dad, brother, sister, teacher, caretaker, and so forth. It’s important to be aware of the roles you play.
This is so you can perform your roles well and in so doing build yourself up, develop goals, and literally see why you matter.We all need each other, directly and indirectly, and so by default you are a part of an amazing web of relationships.
Take some time to think about your place in life. Get outside your head and see yourself in relationship to everything else. Work at being the best mother, artist, or whatever you are.
Focus on others and the service you can provide them. Not just as means of being good, but also to allow that good work to distract you from the sometimes chaotic feelings you endure.
4. Interdependence Mode: Emotional You
This is all about giving and receiving love. Don’t let anxiety prevent you from loving or being loved. You need the support of others and nothing takes that away faster than turning into yourself.
This is also about learning to recognize the whole of your support system and using it wisely. Have you been tight lipped about your problems? No need to be G.I. Jane, or Rambo with your emotions. Be open. Get help.
Conclusion
There is an unofficial mantra used by the United States Marines Corp. And that is that marines improvise, adapt, and overcome. Talk about positive thinking.
The key word in that line is adapt. Adaptation is also the main lesson from the RAM. It’s not just about identifying your problems, it is about adapting to them successfully. Adapting to new stimuli, challenges, and circumstances.
Adaptation is adjustment, modification, and harmonization. You need to adapt to the new environment you’re in. Get in tune with the new you.
This doesn’t mean getting used to it. It means tailoring your thinking, your feelings, everything, to the new situation. This turns things into a “new normal.” Once you adapt it also means that you’re effectively coping.
This may not be the old good from childhood, but it can still be good. And that’s just it. Things can still be good, despite all you’re going through.
Think hard about learning, improvising, and finding things that work for you. It’s also helpful to not assume that once anxiety comes into your life that things need to be like they used to be in order for you to be happy. And by doing that you can and will overcome abnormal anxiety.
This stuff gets deep let me tell you. To get more insight into this interesting topic hit play on the player below.
This podcast was so helpful, thank you!